Of course, it all seems so obvious now! How did we not interpret El Jobso's true meaning of the iPhone kill-switch -- it actually kills you. We have noted iPhone expert Stephen Colbert to thank not just for this brilliant deduction, but also for sticking up for the lot of us and giving the iPhone 3G a cold staredown -- but not before declaring, "I knew I should have gotten a Zune! They can't kill me... or do anything else." Zing!